December
9, 1984
Directed by Dick McDonough ~ Written by Paul Keyes
Lucille
Ball (Honoree), Monty Hall (Host), Nelson Riddle and His Orchestra
Monty Hall was the honorary chairman of Variety Clubs International.
Featuring
Lucy’s family: Gary Morton, Lucie Arnaz, and Desi Arnaz Jr..
Lucy’s
former (and future) guest-stars: Sid Caesar,
Sammy Davis Jr., Dean Martin, John Ritter, as well as uncredited
appearances by Barbara Eden, Eva Gabor, Bernie Kopell, Rich Little,
Cesar Romero, Art Linkletter,
Ken Lane (Dean Martin’s pianist),
Presenters
and entertainers also include: Joan Collins, Cary Grant, Shelley Long,
Carl Reiner, and Vicky McLure
Former
Variety Clubs honorees in attendance: James Stewart, Burt
Reynolds, and Frank Sinatra
Also
present at the party (all uncredited): Loni Anderson, Lloyd Bridges, James Caan, Sammy Cahn, Ted Danson, Barbara and Marvin
Davis (Childhood Diabetes Foundation), Altovise Davis, Charles Durning, Farrah Fawcett, George Hamilton, Barbara Harris
(Mrs. Cary Grant), Lisa Hartman, Ted Lange, Vicki Lawrence, Carol Lawrence, Michele Lee, Olympian Carl
Lewis, Hal Linden, Karl Malden, Roddy McDowell, Gloria Hatrick McLean
(Mrs. Jimmy Stewart), Donna Mills, Stefanie Powers, Barbara Sinatra,
Joan Van Ark, Dick Van Patten, Dionne Warwick, Dennis Weaver, Raquel
Welch, and Betty White.
Taped
at Warner Brothers Studios on November 18, 1984 and aired on CBS on
December 9, 1984. Due to the December air date, the room is decorated
in poinsettias. Lucy makes her entrance holding a dozen long-stem
roses. At Lucy’s center table is her husband Gary Morton, Frank and
Barbara Sinatra, Burt Reynolds and Loni Anderson, Jimmy and Gloria
Stewart, Cary Grant and Barbara Harris.
Variety,
the Children’s Charity
is
an organization founded in Pittsburgh,
Pennsylvania
in
1927, when a group of eleven men involved in show
business
set
up a social club which they named the Variety Club. On Christmas
Eve
1928,
a baby was left on the steps of the Sheridan Square Film Theatre.
When
efforts to trace the mother failed, the Variety Club named the child
Catherine Variety Sheridan, after the club and the theatre on whose
steps she was found, and undertook to fund the child’s living
expenses and education. Later the club decided to raise funds for
other disadvantaged children. The
discovery of the baby inspired the film Variety
Girl (1947).
The
program was the second highest rated show of the night with a 21.7
share, second only to its lead-in “Murder She Wrote” with a 22.3
share.
Monty
Hall says that this is the 9th annual Variety Club All-Star Party. Two years later, Lucille Ball
hosted the 1986 event honoring Clint Eastwood. In 1982 she
participated in the All-Star Party for Carol Burnett.
In
an interview to promote the program, Lucy said that Lucie Arnaz wrote
the lyrics to the “I Love Lucy” tribute song that she and Desi
Jr. sang. But on the show, Burt Reynolds claims the special lyrics
were by Sammy Cahn.
Also
in the interview, Lucy says she’d never do another series again. Two
years later she changed her mind and agreed to do “Life With Lucy”
for Aaron Spelling and ABC. She also says she’d like to do a drama
about seniors being driven from their homes. It is likely that by
November 1984 Lucy was already in talks to do her final film, TV’s
Stone
Pillow,
which would begin filming in April 1985 and air in November of that
same year.
To
kick off the event, the Nelson Riddle Orchestra plays “Hey
Look Me Over” as
Lucy’s entrance music. Lucille Ball introduced the song in the 1960
Broadway musical Wildcat
by Cy Coleman.
Joan
Collins
(TV’s “Dynasty”) details Lucy’s background and rise to fame; 76
films and over 500 television programs. She reminds Lucy that she
auditioned for the role of Scarlet O’Hara in Gone
With The Wind.
In 1987 Collins was honored with her own All-Star Party.
Joan:
“Not
even Clark Gable could look into that face and say ‘Frankly, my dear,
I don’t give a damn’”.
Frank
Sinatra
sings “You Are the Sunshine of My Life” to Lucy, a 1973 song
written and recorded by Stevie Wonder.
Sinatra
says to Lucy “You’re
the best thing to happen to Adam’s rib.”
This causes a quizzical look to come over Lucy’s face. Later in life,
Sinatra was known for his occasional odd references and non-sequitur.
He had been honored by Variety Clubs the previous year, 1983.
Cary
Grant
reads a letter from President Ronald Reagan. Reagan was honored with
an All-Star Party the following year, 1985. When first addressing
Ball, Grant says “Lucy, Lucy, Lucy,” imitating his falsely
attributed quote “Judy, Judy, Judy.” Grant would also read a congratulatory telegram from President Reagan in 1986,
when Clint Eastwood was honored.
Carl
Reiner
introduces and interviews Sid
Caesar
as (all the way from Germany) Professor Ludwig Von Blearyeyes, the
world’s most renowned viewer of Lucille Ball’s television shows. The
Professor describes his second favorite episode of “I Love Lucy”
which is a crazy mash-up of parts of several episodes, including
“Lucy Goes To The Hospital” (ILL S2;E16), “The Audition” (ILL S1;E16), and “Pioneer Women” (ILL S1;E25). The Professor then recounts the
same episode in Italian, proving that Lucy is known all over the
world. The description of the Professor’s favorite episode sounds
like the plot to King
Kong.
John
Ritter
is introduced as a ‘member of Lucy’s mutual admiration society,’ a
fellow comedic actor on TV. Lucille Ball had hosted a two-part
retrospective of Ritter’s show “Three’s Company” in 1982. Ritter
would be Ball’s first celebrity guest-star on “Life With Lucy” in
1986.
Ritter
introduces Olympian Carl
Lewis
and Vicki
McClure,
a young woman from Los Angeles chosen to sing at the opening
ceremonies of the 1984 Summer Olympics. McClure reprises the song she
sang at the ceremonies, “Reach Out and Touch (Somebody’s Hand).”
The song by Ashford and Simpson was
the debut solo single of Motown singer Diana
Ross,
released in April 1970.
McClure, a checkout girl at the Hughes Market in Canoga Park, was at
first just the rehearsal stand-in for Ross but she was chosen for the
real thing because as an unknown, she reflected the youthful image
that organizers hoped to project for the games.
Shelley
Long
(TV’s “Cheers”) admits that she never worked with Lucy, but
admires her as a role model working mother.
Long ‘passes the
baton’ to Dean
Martin,
while the Nelson Riddle Orchestra plays his signature song “Everybody
Loves Somebody Sometime,” a
song written in 1947 by Sam Coslow. Martin sang it in “Lucy
Dates Dean Martin” (TLS S4;E21), as well as on “Lucy Gets
Lucky,” their 1975 special.
Martin (with Ken Lane at the piano) sings “When You’re Smiling”
by Larry
Shay, Mark
Fisher and
Joe Goodwin. He
changes the lyrics to suit the occasion:
“When
you’re Lucy,
When
you’re Lucy,
You’re
never off TV.
When
you’re Lucy,
That’s
all you see,
You’re
own life constantly.
On
Channel 7, 5, 4, 9, 8 or 10,
Wherever
you turn,
That’s
our Lucy again.
When
you’re Lucy,
When
you’re Lucy,
You’re
never off of TV.”
Jimmy
Stewart says
that Lucy and Gary are celebrating their wedding anniversary. Stewart
introduces Gary
Morton,
who presents Lucy with an Olympic-style medal for being a “gold
medal wife.”
Sammy
Davis Jr.’s
first remarks incorporate references to the 1961 musical Stop
the World – I Want To Get Off
by Anthony Newley and Leslie Bricusse. Davis starred in the 1978
Broadway revival of the show as well as the TV special “Sammy Stops
the World” that same year. He then gives a heartfelt and emotion
tribute to Lucy’s world-wide and timeless appeal.
Sammy:
“Lucille
Desiree Ball, daughter of Desiree and Henry Ball, who stopped the
world and said ‘I wanna get on’ in Jamestown, New York. On an August
the sixth, this world of ours took little note then, but will long,
long remember. Be proud, Lucy, of your legacy. Very proud. Be
aware, as you sit here among your grateful friends, the sun never
sets on Lucille Ball. All over this worried world tonight. Nations of
untold millions are watching reruns they also watched the first time
around. In Iran and Iraq on this very night, the fighting stops long
enough for frightened people to laugh again as you hide the
frozen meat in the furnace.
In Finland after a long hard day at the factory, husbands and father
are just settling down to watch the American girl they love the most
get
half bombed on her first TV commercial.
And in Lebanon, ravished Lebanon, worried parents of many fates share
a common experience, with innocent war-torn children, who tune in to
forget the debris long enough to feed their hungry souls with
laughter as
you parade down the Champs Elysee in an outfit that drove the Paris
designers to double aperitifs.
Across the world in Singapore, Japan, whole families gather for a
‘Lucy break’ as laughter erases their problems watching you rehearse
your trip to the hospital for
television’s first birth. And in Mexico, Brazil, Argentina, Chile,
Columbia, Honduras, Guatemala, Peru, San Salvador, Venezuela, and
other sunshine countries, laughter crosses friendly and unfriendly
borders as you try to keep up with the chocolates on the assembly
line. Yes, my dear friend, Lucy, you are the one they love most.”
The
specific “I Love Lucy” episodes Davis is referring to (in order)
are “The Freezer (ILL S1;E29); “Lucy Does a TV Commercial” (ILL
S1;E30); “Lucy Gets a Paris Gown” (ILL S5;E20); “Lucy Goes
to the Hospital” (ILL S2;E16); and “Job Switching” (ILL S2;E1). Lucy later said that Davis wrote the
above speech himself.
Monty
Hall returns to tell Lucy that Variety Clubs International has added
new facilities in children’s hospitals dedicated to John Wayne (in
Miami), Elizabeth Taylor (in New York City), Jimmy Stewart (in
Minnesota), Ingrid Bergman (in Des Moines), Jack Lemmon (in Buffalo),
Burt Reynolds (in Atlanta), Carol Burnett (in Los Angeles), and Frank
Sinatra (in Seattle).
Burt
Reynolds
recounts his first meeting Lucy, through an introduction by Lucie
Arnaz. Lucie and Reynolds dated for a year and a half. Nelson Riddle
and the Orchestra play the “I Love Lucy” theme by Eliot Daniel.
Lucie and Desi Jr. then sing the song to their mother with special
lyrics by Sammy Cahn. Ball struggles to hold back the tears. Lucie
Arnaz is noticeably pregnant. She would give birth to her daughter,
Katherine Luckinbill, on January 11, 1985.
To
the strains of the title song from Mame,
Lucy joins Monty Hall at the front of the room where he informs her
of the naming of a research library in her honor at the Barbara
Davis Juvenile Diabetes Hospital in Denver, Colorado.
Lucille
Ball
thanks everyone for the tribute. She asks Mike Frankovich of Variety
Clubs to stand and take a bow.
Lucy:
“To
everyone who said such wonderful things about me tonight, I just wish
you were all under oath.”
At
the very end, the entire crowd sings “Happy Anniversary” (to the
tune of “Happy Birthday”) to Lucy and Gary, who
were married on November 19, 1961.
Oops!
Over
the entrance music, Lucille Ball can be heard to greet Dionne Warwick
saying “Hi
Diane.”
Did she think Warwick was Diahann Carroll? When Lucy sees Eva, she
just repeats over and over “A
Gabor! A Gabor! A Gabor!”
perhaps unsure if it is Eva or Zsa Zsa. Bear in mind that Ball did
not know the guest list ahead of time. While the announcer reads off
the guests stars for the opening credits, Lucy can be heard to say “I
hope I remember the names.”
When
Gary Morton puts the Olympic medal around Lucy’s neck, she says “Turn
it around!”
Lucy wanted the front of the medal facing the camera. She then jokes
that she is “always directing.”
This
Date in Lucy History
– December 9
“Don
Juan and the Starlets”
(ILL S4;E18) filmed on December 9, 1955
“Lucy
and the Military Academy”
(TLS S2;E10) aired December 9, 1963
“Guess
Who Owes Lucy $23.50”
(HL S1;E11) aired December 9, 1968
Papermoon Loves Lucy 
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