TROUBLE WITH NAMES

June 19, 1973

Los Angeles – Like Jack Paar, Lucille Ball has trouble with names. At a party at her home, a lawn bash catered by Chasen’s and attended by more television editors than you’ll every see in one place, she was mentioning some of the stars who will appear in her show this year, among them John Davis, better known to the public and Miss Ball, when she gets it straight, as John Davidson.

Miss Ball, looking much better in person than she did on the Jack Paar show where she was lighted by Jack the Ripper, did as she usually does, fraternized with her guests before dinner then stood at the microphone where she answered questions from her guests. 

One of the first, not surprisingly, was about Watergate; because so many performers have become politically vociferous, they are being asked to give their opinions on the matter. 

“What the hell do I know about Watergate?” said Miss Ball, who then went on to say that she did feel television was giving the hearing good coverage. 

“People can stop saying that television is no good for anything. I don’t mind missing some of the other programming while it is on,” she said. 

Not too easy with the question, Miss Ball was pleased when someone said he hoped she didn’t mind if he changed the subject. “I’m glad you did,” said Miss Ball, who then discussed her film version of “Mame,” saying the same things she did on the Paar show, that she hopes the people who see her on television will go see the film, that the dancing she does in the film has helped strengthen the leg she broke while skiing and that it is absolutely not true that she did not want Bea Arthur to play Vera. 

It is true, however, that Miss Arthur was omitted from the photographic displays Miss Ball had arranged in her garden, pictures showing Miss Ball dancing, Miss Ball with Robert Preston and Miss Ball looking marvelously young, like no more than 45. 

The actress’ children did not attend the party. Lucy, Jr. was doing “Cabaret” in Flint, Mich., and Desi, Jr. was in parts unknown to his mother, maybe on a date with Joan Crawford. 

A New York columnist asked if Liza Minnelli had coached Lucy, Jr., in preparation for the “Cabaret” production, and Miss Ball said no, she did not, that Lucy would have been overwhelmed by the experience. 

Most Important Question 

Then came the most important question of the evening, was Miss Ball surprised when her son and Miss Minnelli ended their relationship?

“I wasn’t,” she said. “I’ve known Liza since she was a little girl and you know you can’t domesticate a dynamo. 

"Desi was shocked, though. In fact, he was devastated. Then he got a date one night, and I haven’t seen him since." 

Someone asked the name of the girl and before Miss Ball could answer, someone said it was Merle Oberon, some one else said it was Gloria Swanson, and someone else, more playful than the rest, suggested Dame Edith Evans.

Miss Ball didn’t hear any of this, or pretended not to and said she always seemed to get custody of the dogs involved in the romantic affairs of her children. 

She now has seven, she said. Liza left Emaline, and Pooky is Desi’s dog, and when the visitors recorded that information, Miss Ball said, ‘Does that make a story?" 

Not really. Not the story Miss Ball is. She has been on television for 22 years now, consecutive years, and is seemingly indestructible. In 10 years, she will probably be announcing the stars who will do her show, among them, no doubt, Merle Oberon.

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FOOTNOTES FROM THE FUTURE

Lucille Ball was then getting ready to premiere her sixth and final season of “Here’s Lucy” on CBS.  Although not specified here, some of the guest cast Lucy might have announced at the party were Danny Thomas, Ed McMahon, Jackie Coogan, Andy Griffith, Joan Rivers, Foster Brooks, O.J. Simson, Steve Lawrence, Eydie Gorme, Eddie Albert, Frankie Avalon, Chuck Connors, Milton Berle and Phil Harris.  The final season of the series was a rotating roster of celebrities, most playing themselves – or something close.  

“Jack Paar Tonight” (1973) is not to be confused with “The Tonight Show” on NBC, a program he hosted in 1957.  This was an ABC TV late night talk show that was supposed to rival his successor, Johnny Carson.  It failed to do so and was gone by Christmas.  Judging by this June 1973 article, Ball must have appeared on the show in its early days, although records are unclear. 

The press seems intent on trivializing Desi Arnaz Jr.’s recent break-up with singer Liza Minnelli.  Arnaz previously dated actress Patty Duke when he was 17 and she was 23. He accompanied Duke to the 1970 Emmy Awards ceremony where she won the Emmy for Outstanding Single Performance. The relationship became tabloid news and his mother did not approve of them together. Arnaz was subsequently involved with Liza Minnelli, seven years his senior.  Arnaz accompanied Minnelli to the Academy Awards ceremony in March 1973 when she won the Oscar for Best Actress for Cabaret.  The reporters joke about Desi dating such senior celebs as Merle Oberon (born in 1911, same as Lucille), Joan Crawford (born in 1904), Gloria Swanson (born in 1899), and Dame Edith Evans (born in 1888).  

Speaking of Cabaret, Lucie Arnaz was then playing the plum role of Sally Bowles on stage in Flint, Michigan.  With Minnelli winning the Golden Statuette just a few months earlier, one can certainly see why having your brother’s Oscar-winning ex-girlfriend coach you might be an “overwhelming experience”.  This would not be the first time Lucie would play Bowles. She also did the role closer to home in 1972.  

Liza’s father, Vincente Minnelli, directed Lucy and Desi in MGM’s The Long, Long Trailer in 1953.  Liza was seven years old at the time. 

Meryl Oberon died in 1979 – without ever guest-starring on a Lucille Ball sitcom.  A year before her death, in March 1978, however, Oberon and Ball were both in attendance at “The American Film Institute Salute to Henry Fonda” – as close as they ever got.