BUNGLE ABBEY

May 31, 1981

Directed
by Lucille Ball ~ Written by Seaman Jacobs and Fred S. Fox

Synopsis 

The
misadventures of the monks of the Brothers of Benevolence Monks at
the San Fernando Abbey, a monastery founded by Brother Bungle. In the
pilot, the monks attempt to raise $5,000 to help the nearby
children’s orphanage by selling the valuable painting of Brother
Bungle that hangs in the monastery.

Cast

Gale
Gordon
(The Abbot) was said to be the highest paid radio artist of the
1930’s and was in such demand that he often did two or more radio
shows a day. His professional collaboration with Lucille Ball started
in 1938 as the announcer of Jack Haley’s “The Wonder Show”
(Wonder Bread was their sponsor). He played Mr. Atterbury on Lucy’s
“My Favorite Husband” and was a front-runner for the part of Fred
Mertz on “I Love Lucy.” When scheduling prevented his
participation, he appeared as Mr. Littlefield, the Tropicana’s
owner in two
episodes of
the show. In addition to Mr. Littlefield, he played a Judge in “Lucy
Makes Room for Danny,” a
1958 episode of “The Lucy–Desi Comedy Hour.” “The Lucy Show”
solidified his partnership with Lucille Ball for the rest of their
careers. He went on to play Harrison Otis Carter in “Here’s Lucy”
and Curtis McGibbon in “Life with Lucy.” He died in 1995 at the
age of 89.

Charlie
Callas (Brother
Charles) was stand-up comic and actor known for his nervous chatter.
He
was also known for his role as Malcolm Argos, the restaurant owner
and former con man on the Eddie Albert and Robert
Wagner television
series “Switch” (1975–78).
Callas was the voice of Elliott the dragon
in Disney’s live-action/animated musical
film Pete’s
Dragon (1977).
He appeared with Lucille Ball on “Frank Sinatra: The First 40
Years” on NBC. Callas died in 2011 at age 83.

Brother
Charles is in charge when The Abbot is away.

Before entering the monastery, Brother Charles was a nightclub comic.  

Gino
Conforti
(Brother Gino) began
his TV acting career in 1968 and has been continually working since,
although mostly as one-off characters. He had a recurring role as
Felipe on “Three’s Company” from 1980 to 1982, a series Lucille
Ball admired. He played the burglar in “Lucy
Plays Cops and Robbers” (HL S6;E14) in
1974. He was also seen in “Lucy
Gets Lucky” and
“Three for Two” in
1975.  

Before
entering the monastery, Brother Gino was known as “the Little Cat
Burglar.”

Graham
Jarvis
(Brother Virgil) was probably best known as Charlie Haggers on “Mary
Hartman, Mary Hartman” (1976-77). Two days after the airing of his
final series “7th Heaven” on April 14, 2003, Jarvis died at age 72.  

Brother
Virgil is the Abbey’s cook.

Guy
Marks
(Brother Hush) was
born Mario Scarpa in Philadelphia in 1923. He is probably best
remembered as Freddy on 18 episodes of “The Joey Bishop Show”
(1962-63). Marks played a Crook in a 1969 episode of “Here’s Lucy,”
also starring Gale Gordon. He died in Brigantine, New Jersey in
1987.  

Brother
Hush has taken a vow of silence and does not speak. Before entering
the monastery, he was a convicted counterfeiter.

Peter
Palmer
(Brother Peter) was best known on stage and screen as Abner Yokum in
the Broadway and film musical Li’l
Abner (1959),
his screen debut. His most recent screen credit was a 1994 episode of
“Thunder Alley.”  

Brother
Peter enjoys needlepoint. Before entering the monastery he was a professional football player.

Antony
Alda
(Brother Antony) was the son
of actor and Lucille Ball favorite
Robert Alda and Italian actress Flora Marino, making him
the younger half-brother of Alan Alda. The year before this
pilot, he appeared with his half-brother on an episode of “M*A*S*H”.
He died in 2009 at age 52.

Brother
Antony plays the piano, but does not have any dialogue. His name is
not spoken aloud.

William
Lanteau
(Edgar Forsythe) first
appeared with Lucille Ball in The
Facts of Life (1960).
In addition to an episode of “The
Lucy Show,” Lanteau
did four episodes of “Here’s Lucy,” and the 1964 special “Mr.
and Mrs.” He is best remembered for playing Charlie the Mailman in
the play and the film On
Golden Pond (1981).

Edgar
Forsythe is an art dealer of questionable ethics from Chicago.

---

This
unsold pilot was the result of Lucille Ball’s brief stay at NBC.
Aside from the TV special “Lucy Moves to NBC” (February 8, 1980),
this is the only tangible evidence of Ball’s work at the peacock
network. By 1986 she will be on ABC, meaning Lucille Ball has worked
on all three major television networks in her career.

This
pilot was aired just once, on May 31, 1981. It is now only available
for viewing as a bonus feature on the MPI Video release “Lucy
Moves to NBC.”  

This
is Lucille Ball’s only solo directing credit. She was credited as
co-director
of “Lucy, the Sheriff” (HL S6;E18) in 1974 with Coby Ruskin. Ball
fired Ruskin during the rehearsal period and took
over as director. This is a largely matter of semantics. As star,
executive producer, and studio president, Lucille Ball often
‘directed’ from the set, while her directors of record were in the
booth directing camera movement. Most all ‘behind the scenes footage’
of Lucille Ball shot during episode filming (post 1962) bears this
out.

Writers
Fred
S. Fox and Seaman Jacobs
had written 3 episodes of “The Lucy Show” and 28 episodes of
“Here’s Lucy.” Jacobs and Fox wrote extensively for “The Bob
Hope Specials” on NBC. The second draft of the script was submitted
on November 25, 1980.

Aside
from Lucy’s regular co-star Gale Gordon, only three of the cast had
previously worked for Lucille Ball: Guy Marks, William Lanteau, and
Gino Conforti.  Antony Alda and Lanteau were billed as “special
guests” in the end credits. Alda was likely hired as a favor to
his father, Robert, who Lucy cast several times on her sitcoms.

In
the DVD introduction to the pilot, actor Gino Conforti recalls that
the premise was inspired by a bit remembered from a Broadway variety
show such as “New Faces” or “La Plume De Ma Tante” where a
slightly built monk tugged on the abbey bell-pull, which then lifted
him off his feet, up out of sight of the audience. In the pilot, that
bit belongs to Conforti.

THE BUNGLE ABBEY Production Staff

• Lucille Ball’s long-time press rep Howard McClay acted as Creative Consultant on the pilot. McClay’s name was used by Ball when she was talking on the telephone in “Lucy Moves to NBC” the prior year.

• As
  associate director, Ball employed Jerry
  Leshay,
  who had done similar chores on “The Judy Garland Show” (1964) on
  CBS. 
• Lucy and her husband Gary Morton were executive producers, while
  Norman
  C. Hopps
  was their Associate Producer. Hopps had this title for NBC’s hit
  “Sanford and Son” (1972-77) and it’s short-lived spin-off
  “Sanford Arms” (1977). 
• Robert
  Isenberg,
  a television cameraman, is listed as Creative Consultant of “Bungle
  Abbey.” 
• Ten-time Emmy winning Art Director Roy
  Christopher
  was later Art Director for NBC’s hit sitcom “Wings.” 
• Costumer
  Bill
  Belew
  headed
  the design team for Elvis
  Presley’s
  stage wear and much of his personal wardrobe from 1969 to 1977, an
  odd choice considering the “Bungle Abbey” wardrobe consisted
  mostly of monk’s robes. 
• Dialogue
  Coach Ty
  Nutt was
  also listed as a cast member of “Lucy Moves to NBC.”  
• Three time
  Emmy winner  Olin
  Younger
  served as Lighting Director for this pilot as well as “An All-Star
  Party for Lucille Ball” on CBS in 1984. 
• Make Up was by Harry
  Blake,
  who also did many of the NBC Bob Hope specials.  

The
first scene after the opening credits has the monks stomping grapes
for wine! This is an obvious nod to one of the best-loved episodes
of “I Love Lucy,” “Lucy’s Italian Movie” (ILL S5;E23) in
1956.  

As
he stomps grapes, Brother Charles sings and dances a bit of “Forty
Second Street,”
the
title song from
the 1933 film
musical
42nd
Street,
with music by Harry
Warren and
lyrics by Al
Dubin. In 1980, the song was also included in the Broadway musical of the same
name. 

Brother
Virgil
(to a wise-cracking Brother Charles): “Who
do you pray to at night? Milton Berle?”

Milton
Berle
was nicknamed “Mr. Television” during the 1950s. He guest-starred
as himself on a 1957 episode of “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour.” He
also did two episodes of “The Lucy Show” and two of “Here’s
Lucy,” only once playing a character other  than himself.

Later,
inside the Abbey, the monks are playing poker with Brother Virgil’s
stale biscuits acting as chips. Brother Charles holds the stale
biscuits over his eyes and croons a chorus of “I
Only Have Eyes For You,”
another song
by composer Harry
Warren and
lyricist Al
Dubin,
written for the film Dames
(1934). It has become a jazz
standard,
and has been covered by numerous musicians. 

Brother
Charles:
“Brother Virgil, any chance of you making up your mind today?  Are
you gonna call, fold, or what?”
Brother
Virgil: “I
don’t know, I’m praying for divine guidance.”
Brother
Gino:
“From
who? Jimmy the Greek?”

Dimetrios
Georgios Synodinos (1918–96), better known as Jimmy
the Greek,
was a sports commentator
and Las
Vegas bookmaker.
In
1981 he appeared in the film
Cannonball Run as
a bookie.

Brother
Charles:
“Brother Peter, you never told us where you learned to do
needlepoint.”
Brother
Peter:
“From a cheerleader when I was a Dallas Cowboy.”

The
Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders are the best known of the NFL cheer squads. In 1979, ABC aired a TV movie about them, which spawned a
sequel in 1980. The Dallas Cowboys were division champions in 1980
and 1981.

After
Brother Charles introduces The Abbot by doing an imitation of Ed
Sullivan, The Abbot says “Will
you please forget your checkered career as a nightclub comic.”
When
The Abbot is gone, Brother Charles does his W.C. Fields impression.

The
painting of Brother Bungle is said to be a genuine Van Camp at least
sixty years old. On the telephone, Mr. Webber of the Chicago Art
Institute appraises it at about $15,000.

Brother
Charles (to
Brother Virgil): “I
say unto thee. Get thyself into thy miserable kitchen whence thou
hast turned San Fernando Abbey into Heartburn Haven.”

To drive up the price of the portrait bid on by Mr. Forsythe, Brother Charles disguises himself as Signore Alphonso, an art dealer from Rome.  

Brother
Virgil: (pouring
Mr. Forsythe a glass of wine) “I
hope you enjoy our Bungle Burgundy.”
Mr.
Forsythe:
(drinks
and grimaces in revulsion) “Excellent.
I’ve never had Burbank wine before. I’ll take a case.”

After
the painting is sold for $10,000, the monks celebrate by playing
instruments and dancing to “Alexander’s
Ragtime Band,”
a
song by Irving
Berlin.
It was his first major hit, in 1911, the same year Lucille Ball was
born. Lucy Carter and Carol Krausemeyer (Carol Burnett) sang and
danced to it during “The Hollywood Unemployment Follies” (HL
S3;E22) in 1971.

The
Abbot:
“I
took over the Abbey and made it a refuge for the needy. I said
‘Please bring me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses, yearning
to breath free.’”
Brother
Virgil:
“It
says that on the Statue of Liberty.”
The
Abbot:
(incredulous) “It
does???”

In
a 1965 episode of “The Lucy Show,” Mr. Mooney (Gale Gordon)
equates the state of California to
the
Statue
of Liberty
saying: “Give
me your tired, your poor, your weak, your lunatics, your cuckoo birds
– and they all flock here!” This
is another very loose paraphrase of Emma Lazarus’s 1883 poem “The
New Colossus” inscribed at the pedestal of the Statue of
Liberty. 

In
a 1970 TV special “Swing out America” Lucille Ball was the
interior voice of the Statue of Liberty. In an episode of “Life
With Lucy” in 1986, Lucy Barker wore a souvenir Statue of Liberty
Crown and carried a torch and book for a sight gag. The previous
summer, Miss Liberty celebrated her 100th birthday.

---

I have to agree with Gino Conforti, this pilot would never have been picked up for series in 1981. When Gale Gordon is on screen, the show is at least grounded, but when Brother Charles (Charlie Callas) is in charge, it turns into sketch material.  Except for the grape stomping opening, it is hard to see Lucille Ball’s directorial influence.  By today’s standards, the script features some homophobic humor about a monk’s sexual orientation. Brother Hush’s nonsensical and silly hand signs imitating Sign Language are also of questionable taste considering he is not deaf.